Amidst a global pandemic, when rates of stress, anxiety, and depression feel higher than the “norm” I’ve grown accustomed to, the last thing I wanted to hear was, “we’ve terminated your position”. I don’t really remember what was said after that. I think I blacked out for a moment as shock, panic, and sadness flooded my system. After I hung up from the call I kept repeating to myself, “What am I going to do?” I cried. A lot.
There isn’t really a guide for taking care of your emotional well-being during a global pandemic. This is new for all of us. I hope someone is using this time in quarantine to write some sort of guide. And if that person is you, send me your manuscript. Please and thank you!
I grappled with a myriad of emotions using every coping skill I had acquired in my 9 years of therapy. I somehow felt everything and nothing, an exhausting dichotomy. However, it was in that stage of “feeling everything” that a glimmer of excitement struck me. The voice in my head that always said your dreams and aspirations come second to your full-time job was silent. At this moment, there is no longer a full-time job to fall back on. That voice no longer holds validity. A new voice has replaced it, a voice that screams, “now is your chance!” So here I am, taking that chance.
I’m still emotional. I’m still feeling raw. Some nights I have dreams I’m back at my job and the world is functioning as it was. At the same time, it is because of this difficult moment in time that I’ve landed here, ready to take a leap of faith and pursue this business. Am I nervous? Hell yes. Have I also spent my mornings dancing around my apartment with pure joy and excitement that I get to wake up and do what I love full-time? You better believe that ish. So welcome to my business. It’s going to be messy and fun and real and vulnerable. I can’t wait for you to find pieces of yourself within it.
With a little fear and a lot of hype,
Mal